,

3 Key Strategies to Launch Your Child Into Adulthood with Confidence

As parents we all share the same goal: to raise confident, responsible, and motivated young adults who are ready to take on the world. But how do we truly prepare them to thrive in adulthood?

And.. how exactly do we prepare ourselves to let them go with confidence?

The fact is, many parents are struggling mightily with letting go, and countless young adults are finding life on their own to be a rude awakening. Make no mistake these experiences are linked,” says Author Dennis Trittin in his book Wings Not Strings, Parenting Strategies to Let Go With Confidence.

In this video interview, Dennis shares with us three important strategies to launch our child with confidence:

  • The Empowered Parent Philosophy- shifting from control to influence.
  • Moving From Driver to Passenger- guiding, not micromanaging
  • Preparing & Training Our Kids for Adulthood- real world readiness starts now.

 

  • Grab Dennis’ parenting resources HERE
  • Get Amy’s Life Skills List Before The Launch HERE
  • Watch Dennis and Amy talk about the 12 Gifts to Give Your High School Senior for Graduation HERE

 

/0 Comments/by
safer-internet-day
, , ,

What Your Child Needs to Know if They Text or Email

We often give our children a technological device with access to email or texting and forget to take the time to teach them about the dangers of cybercriminals.

Email is the most common method cybercriminals use, but more of them are also showing up by text. So we must take the time to teach our teens how cybercriminals operate and their digital attempts to manipulate, influence or deceive them into taking action that isn’t in their best interest.

3 Ways Cybercriminals Target Through Email and Text

Phishing: this is a process where cybercriminals will trick you with emails disguised as coming from a trusted contact or company. Cybercriminals send persuasive emails to get you to provide information or money by clicking on a malicious link or opening an infected attachment. The goal is to trick you into sharing data.

Spear phishing: these are communications that are targeted and appear more personal. Cybercriminals are getting good at mining personal information from the internet or your social media accounts to make the information in the email appear more legitimate. 

Smishing: targeted text messages wanting you to click a link or take urgent action.

Our children must understand that cybercriminals want them to click or open a link to gain access to private accounts and personal information, and it’s up to us to teach them the warning signs, so they don’t fall into their trap.

Get my FREE Spot the Scams printable workbook by clicking on the image above!

 🚩 IDENTIFY THE RED FLAGS 🚩

Questions to ask yourself to determine if the suspicious email is legitimate…

  1. Does the subject line lure you into urgency, asking you to act fast? 
  2. Does the content evoke emotion, making you feel that you must act immediately? 
  3. Did it come at an unusual time outside of business hours?
  4. Are there typos or grammatical errors?
  5. Can you verify the sender, or does the email address look shady?

Stay alert and stay skeptical! Listen to your intuition, and don’t take any action requested in an email or text unless you are confident the communication is legitimate. Teach your child to always run it by you if they aren’t sure before clicking on any link or following any action.

DOWNLOAD MY FREE SPOT THE SCAMS WORKBOOK TO VISUALLY TEACH YOUR TEEN THIS IMPORTANT LIFE SKILL!

/0 Comments/by
Unplug-Technology-Family-Device-Holder
, ,

5 Ways to Set Your Family up for Screen-Time Success in Your Home

I’ve never been more thankful for technology than I am today. Our devices and connection to the internet allow us regular communication with our college kids and loved ones around the country.

Yet, this same technology that connects us to the vast world also has the power to disconnect us in our own homes if we’re not careful.

So, what can we parents do to set our loved ones up for success when it comes to digital devices?

Here are 5 Ways to Set Your Family up for Screen-Time Success 

Read more

/9 Comments/by
Teach-High-Schoolers-Personal-Health
, ,

3 Things to Teach Your High Schooler Before They Go to College

As my firstborn sons wind down their senior year of high school, I question what I still need to teach them over these next couple of months before launching them off to their respective college campuses come August.

One area where we parents seem to fall short in our teaching is helping our son or daughter manage their health.

In general, we do a relatively good job of talking with our kids about the importance of eating a healthy diet while getting proper exercise and plenty of sleep. Yet, are we failing to prepare our kids to manage their health when they leave our homes?

From the many stories I’ve heard from doctors and nurses, I’m thinking so.

12 GIFTS TO GIVE YOUR HIGH SCHOOL SENIOR FOR GRADUATION

Emergency Room Nurse Charity Hollywood says she consistently sees ill-equipped young adults stream into the emergency room where she works near a large university campus in Arizona. She says that she is striving to raise her 6-year old twin sons to be confident and capable from a young age and encourages other parents to prepare their children better when it comes to managing their health.

What skills do young adults lack when it comes to their health?

What can parents do differently while raising their kids so that they can launch adults who are more confident and capable when managing their health?

Teach-High-Schoolers-Personal-Health

Read more

/5 Comments/by
12-gifts-to-give-high-school-graduates
,

12 Gifts to Give Your High School Senior for Graduation

As I prepare to graduate my firstborn sons from high school and launch them from the safety of our nest this fall, I want to talk about what are the best gifts we can give our Seniors at this special time in our lives.

And guess what….. these gifts won’t cost you much, if anything, at all!

LISTEN IN as my author friend, Dennis Trittin, and I talk about 12 gifts that we think are important to give high school seniors before launching them off into adulthood.

  • Download Dennis’ Resource List: HERE
  • Download Amy’s mock Health History Questionnaire for Teens to practice filling out: HERE
  • Download Amy’s Life Skills for the Launch: HERE
  • Get your personalized college stationery HERE

Who needs some strategies to give your kids Wings, Not Strings, and to launch young adults who can soar with confidence? Wings-Not-Strings-Parenting-Book

 

/28 Comments/by
Family-Meeting-Agendas
, ,

Why You Should Make Family Meetings A Habit in Your Home (Whether You Have Toddlers or Teens)

Growing up, I hung out at my best friend Mary’s house a lot, and, every once in a while, Mary’s mom would tell me it was time for their family conference and that I was going to need to leave. As my two feet carried me home, I thought about how their family ritual seemed strange. My parents didn’t do this sort of thing in our home, so why would my friend’s family need to have meetings when we didn’t?

As I aged, I began to appreciate the fact that Mary’s family set aside sacred time for them and them alone. Her Mom wasn’t worried about catering to me or anyone else that she had to send away to protect their family time. They had an intentional system to connect, and I carried that idea forward into my family today.

Monthly-Family-Meeting-Agenda

WHY SHOULD PARENTS CREATE A HABIT OF HOLDING FAMILY MEETINGS?

Because families today are going in all directions. Holding mindful family meetings is a way to slow down and purposely connect with your family members regularly. These meetings are a relaxed way for everyone to gather and communicate together.

Family meetings are a time to get honest about the strengths and weaknesses of your family and to talk about how things are going within your family unit and individually. Family meetings are meant to be fun and promote a sense of belonging.

HOW OFTEN SHOULD YOU HOLD FAMILY MEETINGS?

Weekly? Monthly? Quarterly?

Decide what works for your family according to your current schedule. If you have younger kids, it will be easier to meet up around the family table for weekly meetings. As kids get older, this becomes more difficult, although just as important. 

Adriane Thompson of Raising Kids With Purpose says she and her husband, along with their three sons ages 9, 6, and 1, meet on Sunday evenings, and “the meetings are usually a mix of screaming, running around, dancing, and cheering with a dash of order.” She says that even with the chaos, something amazing happens:

  • Our kids have input on decisions that impact them.
  • Problems or challenges get addressed in a judgment-free zone.
  • Our family values are highlighted and reiterated.
  • We find out if something is going on with someone that didn’t come up during the week.
  • Everyone feels like they are part of something bigger than themselves and that they have others cheering them on.
  • Chores and family contributions are assigned.

HOW LONG SHOULD YOUR FAMILY MEETING LAST?

Adriane says they keep their weekly family meeting to 15 minutes. “When we first started having meetings, we would all say something nice about each person in our family. Then once all the compliments were finished, that person would get to dance around the house hearing us chant their name. My toddler loved this part. But what ended up happening was the meeting got dragged out making it too long to keep attention,” she said.

WHERE SHOULD YOU HOLD YOUR FAMILY MEETINGS?

I want our “formal” dining room table to be a place where we regularly gather for connective tech-free time together, so this is where we hold our meetings.

The Thompsons prefer to switch up where they meet, and Adriane says, “You may even want to consider changing it up once a month and doing it at a park, a froyo place, Chick-fil-A or somewhere where the kids can have fun afterward.”

FIGURE OUT YOUR PURPOSE 

Claim what it is you want to accomplish through holding your family meetings.

“The goal of a Family Meeting should be to open communication between everyone in the family. Allowing our kids to have a voice gives them autonomy, but also in this type of environment they can get a lot of guidance and know who is ultimately in charge,” says Adriane.

SET THE MOOD

Purposely set the mood and tone of the room to match how you want your family meeting to feel. Do you want it to be fun and upbeat, or do you want it to be serene and serious? Our family meetings always include a dessert, and I light candles so that the space feels calm and inviting.

Adriane agrees to include a special treat for the kids to enjoy during the meeting. “This can be anything from popcorn, special smoothies, muffins to frozen yogurt. Our kids aren’t used to getting a lot of sweet treats, so a family meeting is a perfect time to let them indulge a little,” she says.

END THE MEETING WITH A FUN RITUAL OR FAMILY EVENT

When you have younger kids, you can add an element of fun to the very end of the meeting, such as a dance party or something silly.

For those with older kids, Audrey Monke, Mother of 5 and Writer at Sunshine Parenting says, “Playing a board game or watching your favorite TV show together could be a reward for having the meeting.”

Family-Meeting-Agendas

PLAN YOUR AGENDA

Both Adriane and I, have Family Meeting Agendas that we print out and use for our family meetings, while Audrey says, “You don’t have to get fancy with your agenda. We keep ours on a legal pad, and we take turns being the “chair” of the meeting. Leading the session is good communication practice for kids.”

DOWNLOAD ADRIANE’S WEEKLY FAMILY AGENDA HERE

HERE’S WHAT TO INCLUDE ON YOUR AGENDA

  • What’s working well in your family, and what’s not working so well?
  • What changes do we need to make and what do we want to keep the same?
  • Talk about a value or life skill you want to strengthen.
  • Discuss how well you are serving and loving other people.
  • Coordinate the Family Calendar.
  • Discuss any needs for school or work projects, so you get out of the habit of running out last minute for that poster board!
  • Do you want to pay allowance or any other rewards?

Raising Kids With Purpose Family Meeting Agenda-10

HOW TO KICK OFF THE MEETING 

Start By Saying Something Nice

We used to start our family meetings by turning to the person next to us and saying something we loved about them. Complimenting one another no longer flies with teenagers, but that practice certainly made for some sweet memories and strengthened our bonds.

Use Conversation Starters

Our family loves using Conversation Starter products around the table. Our favorites are Togather or Food With Thought.  These questions always seem to lighten the mood of the meeting, and we gain better insight into who one another is. 

Say Highs and Lows

You can also begin with Highs and Lows, where everyone thinks of something positive and something not so positive that recently happened to them.

OTHER GREAT IDEAS TO INCLUDE

Word of the Week

Adriane says her family picks a word from a “words to make you sound smarter” list or “words to study for the SAT,” and they discuss the meaning as well as try to use it throughout the week. I love this idea!

Meal Planning 

Take the time during meetings to plan your weekly dinner menu or to plan for school lunches. Get the whole family involved in what they want to eat for the week and decide who is going to help shop and make the meals too!

No matter if we are raising toddlers or teenagers, we must take the time and make an effort to connect with them regularly. Family meetings tell our kids that they matter. That our family matters. That our thoughts and actions matter.

Setting aside this sacred time for your family, whether it be weekly, monthly or quarterly, is a perfect way to let your kids know you care about them and the overall health of your entire family.

What do you think is important to include in family meetings?

/2 Comments/by
gifts-for-16th-birthday
, ,

5 Gifts to Give Your Teen for Their 16th Birthday

How does this…

triplet-sons-driving-16

Turn into this… in a few blinks of an eye.

I’m not sure how we’re already at this stage in our family, but I have to say these guys are way more fun now than they ever were 16 years ago!

The big question I’m asked is did we buy them three cars for their milestone birthday?

Not a chance.

If there was no car with a bow, no epic party or promised iPhone X, then what did we give our 16-year-olds besides a little cash?

Sometimes we can get so caught up in what material item to buy or what Pinterest worthy event to throw, that we forget what’s really important to give our kids- the gift of lifelong values.

gifts-for-16th-birthday

1. The Gift of Desire

All my sons desired for their birthday was to get their drivers’ licenses and hit the open road. They wanted the gift of freedom as they turned 16, and that’s what we gave them- a ride to the DMV.

There was no party, no promise of the latest electronic or a new car. We had simply instilled in our boys the desire to set up their own appointments online to take the driving test the minute they could on their birthday. I wasn’t even aware that you could do that. Good for them.

Read more

/16 Comments/by
, ,

4 Ways to Create Meaningful Traditions in a Glass Jar

We read about various simple traditions created within a glass jar. We love the ideas and we’re inspired to start, yet regular life gets in the way and somehow we never get around to actually accomplishing one ourselves.

Let’s turn our intentions into action and start that meaningful glass jar tradition now.

Read more

/6 Comments/by
10-Questions-to-ask-in-New-Year
,

10 Questions to Ask Yourself in the New Year

Before You Plan Ahead, Reflect Back: 10 Questions to Review Your 2024

Before you dive into setting resolutions, goals, and dreams for the upcoming year, take a moment to pause and reflect on the year that’s just passed. To truly move forward with intention, it’s essential to look back at the journey you’ve been on.

Why Reflect?
Reflection is more than a look in the rearview mirror—it’s a chance to celebrate victories, acknowledge growth, and uncover lessons that can guide you into the New Year. After all, you can’t know where you’re going until you understand where you’ve been.

Here are 10 meaningful questions to help you review your 2024 and set the stage for a purposeful 2025:

Read more

/1 Comment/by
8-things-parents-need-to-stop-doing-for-teens-this-school-year
, ,

Stop Doing These 8 Things for Your Teen This School Year

Don’t judge me if you happen to see my kids eating packaged Ritz crackers for school lunch.

Don’t judge me if they’re on the sidelines of PE because they forgot their uniform.

Don’t judge me if they didn’t turn in their homework because it’s still sitting home on their desk.

What some may view as a lack of parenting, is what I deem parenting on purpose, as we work to build necessary life skills in our kids.

I stopped making daily breakfasts and packing school lunches long ago.

I don’t feel obligated to deliver forgotten items left behind at home.

School projects and homework are not any part of my existence.

How do we raise competent adults if we’re always doing everything for our kids?

Let's parent our kids to be capable adults! I love this Ann Landers quote!

Walk away from doing these 8 things for your teen this school year

1. Waking them up in the morning

If you are still waking little Johnny up in the mornings, it’s time to let an alarm clock do its job. My foursome has been expected to get themselves up on early school mornings since they started middle school. There are days one will come racing out with only a few minutes to spare before they have to be out the door. The snooze button no longer feels luxurious when it’s caused you to miss breakfast.

I heard a Mom actually voice out loud that her teen sons were just so cute still, that she loved going in and waking them up every morning. Please stop. I find my sons just as adorable as you do, but our goal is to raise well-functioning adults here.

2. Making their breakfast and packing their lunch

My morning alarm is the sound of the kids clanging cereal bowls. My job is to make sure there is food in the house so that they can eat breakfast and pack a lunch.

One friend asked, yeah but how do you know what they’re bringing for school lunch? I don’t. I know what food I have in my pantry and it’s on them to pack up what they feel is a good lunch. It will only be a few short years and I will have no idea what they are eating for any of their meals away at college. Free yourself away from the PB and J station now.

3. Filling out their paperwork

Have kids fill out and sign all school paperwork and put on clipboard before you sign

I have a lot of kids, which equates to a lot of beginning of the school year paperwork. I used to dread this stack until the kids became of age to fill all of it out themselves. Our teens are expected to fill out all of their own paperwork, to the best of their ability. They put the papers to be signed on a clipboard and leave it for me on the kitchen island. I sign them and put them back on their desks. This makes life much easier for everyone.

Hold your teens accountable. They will need to fill out job and college applications soon and they need to know how to do that without your intervention. When they start applying for college, they’ll need to be more organized because of the workload they’ll be receiving.

4. Delivering their forgotten items

Monday morning we pulled out of the driveway and screeched around the corner of the house when daughter dear realized she forgot her phone. “We have to go back, Mom!” Another exclaimed that he forgot his freshly washed PE uniform folded in the laundry room. I braked in hesitation as I contemplated turning around. Nope. Off we go, as the vision surfaced of both of them playing around on their phones before it was time to leave.

Parents don’t miss opportunities to provide natural consequences for your teens. Forget something? Feel the pain of that. Kids also get to see, that you can make it through the day without a mistake consuming you.

We also have a rule that Mom and Dad are not to get pleading texts from school asking for forgotten items. It still happens, but we have the right to just shoot back “that’s a bummer.”

text message

5. Making their failure to plan your emergency

School projects do not get assigned the night before they are due. Therefore, I do not run out and pick up materials at the last minute to get a project finished. I do always keep poster boards and general materials on hand for the procrastinating child. But, other needed items, you may have to wait for. Do not race to Michaels for your kid who hasn’t taken time to plan.

This is a good topic to talk about in weekly family meetings. Does anyone have projects coming up that they’re going to need supplies for so that I can pick them up at my convenience this week?

6. Doing all of their laundry

laundry time

“What? YOU didn’t get my shorts washed? This response always backfires on the kid who may lose their mind thinking that I’m the only one who can do laundry around here. Every once in awhile a child needs a healthy reminder that I do not work for them. The minute they assume that this is my main role in life is the minute that I gladly hand over the laundry task to them.

Most days I do the washing and the kids fold and put their clothes away, but they are capable of tackling the entire process when need be.

7. Emailing and calling their teachers and coaches

If our child has a problem with a teacher or coach, he is going to have to take it to the one in charge. There is no way that we, as parents, are going to question a coach or email a teacher about something that should be between the authority figure and our child.

Don’t be that over-involved parent. Teach your child that if something is important enough to him, then he needs to learn how to handle the issue himself or at least ask you to help them.

8. Meddling in their academics

National Junior Honor Society middle school induction ceremony Cocopah Middle School

Put the pencil down parents. Most of the time, I honestly couldn’t tell you what my kids are doing for school work. We talk about projects and papers over dinner, but we’ve always had the expectation for our kids to own their work and grades. At times, they’ve earned Principals Lists, Honor Rolls, and National Junior Honor Society honors on their own accord. At other times, they’ve missed the mark.

These apps and websites, where parents can go in and see every detail of children’s school grades and homework, are not helping our overparenting epidemic.

Every blue moon I will ask the kids to pull up their student account and show me their grades because I want them to know I do care. I did notice our daughter slacking off at the end of last year and my acknowledgment helped her catch up, but I’m not taking it on as one of my regular responsibilities and you shouldn’t be either.

What is your parenting goal?

Is it to raise competent and capable adults?

If so, then lets work on backing off in areas where our teens can stand on their own two feet. I know they’re our babies and it feels good to hover over them once in a while, but in all seriousness, it’s up to us to raise them to be capable people.

I want to feel confident when I launch my kids into the real world that they are going to be just fine because I stepped back and let them navigate failure and real-life stuff on their own.

So please don’t judge me if my kids scramble around, shoving pre-packaged items into that brown paper lunch bag, before racing to catch the bus.

It’s all on purpose, my friends.

/585 Comments/by